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This is why I love my readers. Y’all are hilarious geniuses. Cherrifox of the Hygenie blog (yes, there’s a whole blog about how dirty and nasty we all are) sent me this post:

“According to [the New York City Department of Health] website, Jay’s 40/40 Club has aced their last 13 inspections in a row! Meanwhile, Puffy’s restaurant, Justin’s, which recently closed down, was one of the grimyest spots in the city. It’s amazing that Puffy was able to keep Justin’s open for another 2 years after scoring a chart-topping 82 violations in a single visit. I guess it’s like Puff told us, “I’m the king of all kings, I abide by no rules, and do what I do by any means.”

I love how bizarre and random this is. And that they actually took the time to make this comparison.

But then I kept exploring more of the Hygenie blog and now I feel itchy and queasy.

How’s this for a mental nightcap?

“Studies have shown that [grocery] shopping cart handles are one of dirtiest surfaces we can touch. One in five carts tested positive for the presence of blood, mucus, saliva or urine.”

“Don’t perform cosmetic shaving. Needless shaving of the chest or legs or genital areas have been associated with increased outbreaks of Methicillin-Resistant Staph aureus (MRSA). Consider cropping or closely trimming the areas if necessary.”

(barf)