(Deuces: Karrueche at the Trump Hotel Soho, Chris Brown at the Gansevoort Hotel where Rihanna was staying)

wow, this is some epic soap-operatics.
After months of waffling between a civilian girlfriend (Karrueche Tran), and a superstar ex-girlfriend (Rihanna)…Chris Brown seemingly choose Rihanna over Karrueche in a very public way, going with her to the Jay-Z concert in Brooklyn. (While Karrueche waited in nearby at the Trump Hotel Soho)

Then, in a foregone conclusion, Chris announced today that he’s “decided to be single.” Better late than never, given my criticisms of the blatant nose-rubbing affair with Rihanna…

But he gives two different explanations about why he’s going bachelor…
More after the jump…

(Chris Brown and Rihanna at the Jay-Z concert, sitting behind Rita Ora and Beyonce. Via YN)

Chris Brown, in a statement sent to various outlets:

I have decided to be single to focus on my career. I love Karrueche very much but I don’t want to see her hurt over my friendship with Rihanna. I’d rather be single allowing us to both be happy in our lives.

I have decided to be single.
The Neil Armstrong declaration for Bros everywhere.

But this statement is kind of a mess…Is Chris’ now a martyr of single-dom because of his demanding career, or is it because he wants to “allow” Karrueche to be happy? Those are two very different things.

I’d love to dissect the awesome MC Escher endless staircase of that last sentence too. Here’s one possible fantasy translation:
“I would rather take on the courageous burden of being unattached to any one bedpost because that sacrifice would free this gal that I have enjoyed instagramming with to be happy that she no longer has the right to complain about me dating my ex-girlfriend while she is locked inside a child-proofed SUV out in the parking lot. An unexpected secondary benefit of my decision will be…my happiness.”

The end of the Chris x Karrueche instagrams…Bring on the era of the Chris x Rihanna instagrams

Chris Brown and Rihanna Enjoy Date Night at the Jay-Z Show, Karrueche Tweets Surrender